


How Do I Say I Need You?

by AutonomicRogue



Category: Captain America (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst and Fluff and Smut, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Hurt/Comfort, My First Smut, Oral Sex, Shameless Smut, Vaginal Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-27
Updated: 2018-08-27
Packaged: 2019-07-03 05:12:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,538
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15812103
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AutonomicRogue/pseuds/AutonomicRogue
Summary: Steve shouldn’t be upset, heshouldn’t. Natasha’s a grown woman and has been one of his best friends since middle school, she’s perfectly capable of making her own decisions, and it’s reallynothis place to get upset over the decisions she makes. So why was he sitting on the other side of the bar, tossing back shots of whisky and glasses of beer like it’s his job?





	How Do I Say I Need You?

**Author's Note:**

> Oh boy, so this is my first pure smut story. I've never written one before, so I definitely would love some feedback on it! I've been toying with this idea for a while and finally decided to write it. This is just a one-shot, but I would like to get back to this 'verse at some point in time. 
> 
> Please leave comments and kudos!

Steve shouldn’t be upset, he _shouldn’t_. Natasha’s a grown woman and has been one of his best friends since middle school, she’s perfectly capable of making her own decisions, and it’s really _not_ his place to get upset over the decisions she makes. So why was he sitting on the other side of the bar, tossing back shots of whisky and glasses of beer like it’s his job? 

He had just ordered another shot when he felt a small body slide into the seat next to him. “And a shot of vodka,” he murmured to the bartender, not bothering to check who had slid in next to him. 

Natasha bumped into his arm with her shoulder. “Are you going to sit over here and brood all night?” she asked, a teasing smile on her lips. 

“Maybe,” Steve replied, grabbing the fresh shot and tossing it back. 

Natasha rolled her eyes and reached for her shot. “Well, are you at least going to tell me why you’re brooding?” 

“Nope,” he snapped. As he reached out for his beer, Natasha slapped his hand away. “What are you doing, Nat?” He sighed, turning in his chair to look at her. 

“You’re not drinking any more until you tell me what’s going on with you.” 

“I already said I don’t want to talk about it Nat,” he replied as he attempted to grab the glass again. Natasha scooped up the glass and tossed back the remainder of his beer. She slammed the empty glass down an eyebrow raised in challenge at him. Steve held her gaze for a moment before reaching into his wallet and pulling out several bills. He slid them over to the bartender and told him to keep the change. He slid his seat backward and pushed his way through the crowded bar, Natasha following close behind, over to where their friends were sitting. Steve grabbed his brown leather jacket off the back of one of the empty chairs and threw it over his shoulders. 

“Aww Steve, don’t leave yet!” Wanda whined from her spot next to Bucky on one of the couches. 

“Yeah punk, where do you think you’re going?” Bucky chimed, narrowing his eyes at him. 

“I’m just not feeling it tonight guys, and I’ve got an early start tutoring some freshmen in art history tomorrow morning. I’ll see you guys later,” he replied, offering them a small smile as he turned to leave. 

“Nat, not you too!” Pepper squealed. 

“Early morning rehearsal.” Natasha shrugged on her black jacket, waved goodbye to the group, and scrambled to catch up with Steve. 

Steve didn’t say anything as he hailed a cab but held the door open for her to slide in before him. He knew when she had her mind set to something, she didn’t back down, so trying to get her to go home wasn’t going to work. 

The ride back to his apartment was silent aside from the few words Steve said to the driver about the address and thanking him once they got there. Natasha followed as Steve led the way into the apartment building, though she’s there so often she could walk it blind and still get there just fine. She waited patiently as he dug the keys out of his pocket and opened up the door, gesturing for her to walk in before him. She nodded and walked into the spacious apartment, moving to take her jacket off before she felt Steve’s hands grab the edges of it, helping her out of it before hanging it in his coat closet. A small smile turned up at the edge of her lips as she watched him hang his coat up as well. If he was still helping her out of her coat and hanging it up for her, something he’s done since they were in high school, he couldn’t be _that_ upset. 

“Are you going to tell me what’s wrong?” she asked as he walked past her and to the kitchen. 

Steve sighed as he pulled two beers out of the fridge, “can you just drop it Nat? I’m fine.” He walked back out into the living room and handed her one of the beers. 

“It’s obviously not fine if you still won’t talk to me,” Natasha replied, taking a swig of her beer. 

“There’s nothing to talk about Nat,” Steve mumbled the tension returning to his body. 

Natasha stood in front of where he was sitting on the couch and peered down at him. He immediately turned his gaze to look at something else, anything else in the apartment. Was he mad at _her_? 

“I’m not going to drop it until you tell me what’s going on with you.” Natasha set her beer down on the coffee table and placed her hands on her hips. “I suggest you just tell me what’s bothering you. The sooner you do, the sooner I can go to your kitchen and pop popcorn for us to eat while we watch shitty movies.” 

“Nat,” Steve said, his voice sounding like a warning. “Drop it.” He finally met her eyes, the usual light blue seemingly darker, anger bubbling just below the surface. 

“No,” Natasha shot back. 

“Jesus _fuck_ , Natasha. You can’t ever just leave shit alone can you?” He snapped. He pushed himself up off of the couch, nearly knocking her over in the process. He stabilized her before he pushed past her, pulling his hand away from her arm like the mere touch of her skin underneath his fingers had burned him. 

“Actually Steve, I can’t. Not when you’re acting like a child,” Natasha spat back. 

“I’m the one acting like a child?” He yelled. Natasha took a step back as if he had physically pushed her. He never yelled at her. He never really yelled in general if he could help it. The only time she ever really heard him yell was when he was on the football field back in high school. 

“Yeah, you are,” Natasha shouted back. She could feel herself getting angrier by the second. 

“I told you to leave me alone. I told you that I didn’t want to talk about it, but you never listen, do you?” He turned back to face her, his eyes practically burning in anger now. 

“Not when you’re being a fucking idiot about it.” Natasha stormed over to him and shoved him in the shoulders. “You don’t just get to bottle things up and drown it in booze,” she yelled, shoving him again. “Just fucking talk to me about it!” She went to shove him one more time, but he caught her wrists. 

“Don’t,” he growled. She tried to wiggle out of his hold, but his grip was firm. Not tight enough to hurt her, but definitely not something she could easily get out of. His eyes were piercing as he stared at her, “you,” he huffed out, releasing her arms. 

“What?” Her eyebrows furrowed together as she continued to look at him. 

“You,” he repeated, “you’re what’s wrong.” He slid past her, grabbing his beer off the table and chugging the rest of it. 

“I’m- are you fucking kidding me?” Natasha yelled. “How the fuck am I what’s wrong?” 

“Because I shouldn’t even be mad Nat. It shouldn’t be driving me crazy, but it is. I can’t stop fucking thinking about it,” he shouted back at her, tossing the empty bottle into the trashcan. “It makes me feel fucking sick and it’s infuriating because it’s not even my place to care or say anything.” 

“What are you-“ Natasha stopped, the realization of what he was talking about finally hitting her. “Murdock?” she asked incredulously. “Is that what you’re upset about?”

Steve sighed and ran his hands through his hair, “yeah.” 

Now it was Natasha’s turn to get mad, “you’re upset about that? You have no right-“ 

“-I know I have no right Nat, that’s what I’ve been trying to tell you.” 

“For starters, the girls only brought it up because they think that it’s funny, and if you’d have stuck around, you would’ve heard that it was just one time. It was a stupid, drunk one-night stand that I instantly felt fucking sick about it in the morning.” She stormed over to him, her hands clinched at her sides like they always were when she was angry. Steve placed his hands firmly on the counter, his head hung low. “And it wouldn’t have even happened if you didn’t go out with Sharon Carter!” 

Steve’s head shot up at the mention of Sharon’s name, his anger bubbling back up once more, “you told me to go out with her.”

“Yeah, well, I didn’t think you actually would.” 

“Then why’d you even suggest it,” he shouted as he walked around the island, pinning her between him and the marble slab behind her. 

“What was I supposed to do, Steve? Ruin our friendship by telling you that I didn’t want you to go out with her? Should I have told you that I wanted you to go out with me instead?” She hissed. 

Steve blinked, his expression dumbfounded as he stared back at her. He didn’t say anything for a long while, trying to process everything that she just said. 

“And that’s exactly why I never said anything,” Natasha mumbled, attempting to push Steve aside to leave. Steve grabbed her arm and kept her in place. “What do you-“ Natasha was cut off by Steve crashing his lips over hers. She was taken aback for a moment, her eyes blown wide before she gave into the sensation and closed them, winding her arms around Steve’s neck to deepen the kiss. 

“What was-“ Natasha panted, trying to catch her breath. 

“Did he make you come?” Steve asked, his eyes piercing hers as he looked down at her. 

“What?” Natasha asked, her heart skipping a beat. At least some of her surprise must’ve shown on her face because his lips twitched up into a smirk. 

“You heard me, Nat,” he whispered, his voice dangerously low. He leaned closer to her ear, his lips brushing the shell of it. He punctuated every word as he repeated himself, “did he make you come?” 

Natasha’s skin tingled as she felt his breath against the side of her face, her eyes fluttering shut at the gravel in his voice. “No,” she practically whimpered. 

“You poor thing,” he replied, bringing his hand up to run his thumb across the apple of her cheek. He met her eyes again, that dangerously sexy smirk still on his lips as he said, “I guess I’ll just have to fix that.” 

Natasha felt a burst of heat unfurl low in her stomach as Steve brought his hand around to the back of her head, pulling her lips to his once more. Natasha eagerly returned the kiss and welcomed Steve’s arms as he wrapped her legs around him to carry her to the bedroom, his lips never once leaving hers. Steve stumbled into the room, using his foot to shut the door behind him before pinning Natasha up against it. 

“If this isn’t okay Nat, tell me to stop, I will,” he panted. Natasha could hear the sincerity in his voice but could also see the protest in his eyes. 

“Don’t you dare,” she huffed, her head rolling back to hit the door as his lips connected with her neck. She let out a breathy moan as Steve continued to lavish the column of her neck with needy open-mouth kisses. He reached his hand for the hem of her shirt, pulling it up and off of her body before tossing it unceremoniously onto the ground beside them. Natasha fumbled with the buttons of his shirt, attempting to focus on getting them undone as Steve reached around her back, quickly unhooking the clasp of her bra and freeing her breasts. He groaned as he pulled the bra off of her and took in the sight. Natasha shoved his shirt down his arms before grabbing his undershirt and pulling it over his head. He pressed his body up against hers, the door biting into her back. She couldn’t help but notice how _right_ his body felt against hers. “Steve,” she moaned as he peppered her shoulder with kisses. 

“I know,” he replied, bringing his hand down to undo the button on her jeans. He pulled her back to his body, carrying her over to the edge bed, pulling her jeans off of her before dropping to his knees in front of her. “God you’re so beautiful, Natasha.” He hooked his fingers around the waistband of her panties but didn’t make any move to pull them off. 

“Steve, please,” Natasha whined, bucking her hips slightly at him. He smiled and obliged, pulling them down her legs to find her practically _dripping_ in anticipation of him. 

He hummed in delight as he tossed them to the side, taking in the sight of her naked body laid out for him. “So fucking beautiful Nat,” he murmured again, pushing himself up to kiss on her neck. Natasha reached her hand between them, grabbing the button of his jeans and unhooking them trying to push them down his body as he kissed his way onto her chest. She could feel him smiling as he kissed over her breasts, taking one of her nipples into his mouth and sucking lightly. Natasha let out a sharp moan as he took the nipple between his teeth, his tongue flicking lightly over it, the sound traveling directly to his already erect member. He paid the other breast just as much attention before kissing his way down the rest of her body, kissing on her hipbones as he slid his jeans off. 

Natasha willed herself to sit up, pulling his head off of her hips as she grasped for his boxers. “No, no, no,” Steve said, gently pulling her hands off of him. “Not yet, love.” Natasha whined and reached for him again. Steve let out an amused laugh and pushed her to lay back on the bed. He dropped to his knees in front of her once more, kissing just below her navel before continuing, “There will be plenty of time for that later, but I fully intend on making you come long before that.” 

Natasha moaned as he spread her legs apart, taking a single finger and tracing up her slit. “So wet, Nat,” he whispered as he placed a kiss to her thigh. 

“Please,” she begged, squirming as she felt his breath against where she was aching for him. Steve hummed as he licked a broad stripe up her center, stopping just short of the little bundle of nerves that would drive her crazy. The moan that she let out was absolutely _filthy,_ and if it was anyone else, she might’ve felt a little self-conscious about how needy it sounded, but _fuck._ This was _Steve_ she was talking about. They’d been chasing this for years and fuck if it isn’t everything that she thought that it was going to be and more. She let out a long breathy moan of his name as he licked up her center again, the tip of his tongue flicking her bundle of nerves as he went. Natasha’s body jerked at the sensation, her legs attempting to close around Steve’s head. 

Steve gently pushed her legs back apart, kissing the inside of her thigh as he said, “keep yourself spread for me, love. I’m going to make you feel so good.” Natasha whined, but complied, allowing him to push her legs apart once more. The languid pace that he had previously set gone as he continued to hit her bundle of nerves, coaxing moan after beautiful moan out of her. She was just at the brink of her release when Steve stopped.

“No,” she gasped as she felt the wisps of her orgasm beginning to dull once more. She twisted her hand into his hair, pulling him back to where she ached for him. Steve chuckled, but obliged, eager to give her what she wanted. It only took a few more flicks of his tongue before she was careening over the edge, yanking on his hair as he worked her through her orgasm. It wasn’t until she batted him away that he finally stopped. Natasha panted, trying to catch her breath as Steve sat back on his knees, taking in the flush of her face, and the way her breasts rose and fell as she came off of her high. The image was enough to make his cock twitch in anticipation. 

“Good?” He asked, a self-satisfied smile painted on his face. Natasha pushed herself up on her elbows, taking in the sight of his tousled hair, chiseled abs, and the glint of desire in his eyes. She practically threw herself into his arms, wrapping her arms around him, and pulling his lips to hers. She groaned as she tasted herself on him. 

“I want you. Now,” she demanded, reaching down to push his boxers away. Steve groaned and sat up on his knees, allowing her to free him from the fabric. She immediately grabbed onto his shaft, running her thumb along the tip spreading the pearl of pre-cum that had collected there. Steve let out a broken moan as he relished in the way her hand felt around him. She worked her hand over him, his groans becoming more strained before he pushed her back. 

“Stop,” he breathed, crashing his lips back over hers and laying her back against the bed. He scrambled over to the night stand, digging through it. “Shit, Nat, I don’t have-“ 

“It’s fine,” she cut him off. “I’m on the pill and I trust you, just get over here.” 

Steve hesitated only for a second before crawling back on top of her. He kissed on her neck, paying special attention to the spot where her neck and shoulder meet, drawing needy moans out of her. He lined himself up with her, stopping to look at her. “Nat, are you sure?” He asked, pulling back to look at her face. 

Natasha smiled and brought a hand up to the side of his face, “never been more sure about anything,” she replied. Steve smiled and leaned down to give her a gentle kiss, a sharp contrast to the intensity of the moment. He began to gently push in to her, fighting back the urge to slam into her, for both of their sake. Natasha’s face contorted in pure ecstasy as she moaned Steve’s name out. He gasped as he reached the hilt, filling her fully. 

“So perfect, Nat,” he groaned as he began to pull back out once more. Natasha’s protesting whine turned into a deeply satisfied moan as he pushed back in, his speed increasing. “God-Nat-I,” he panted. 

“I know,” she replied, wrapping her legs around his hips to give him a better angle. “Steve,” she gasped, “I’m gonna-“ 

Steve thrusted harder, determined to bring her to her release again. He felt her walls begin to spasm around him, quickly building him to his own release as well. “Nat,” he breathed feeling the pressure building at his base. He reached between them, rubbing his thumb over her bundle of nerves, taking Natasha over the edge once more. She moaned his name and wrapped her arms around his shoulders, determined to get as close to him as she could. It only took a few more thrusts before Steve was falling apart behind her, the spasms of her muscles drawing out both of their orgasms. They both stayed there, attempting to catch their breaths before Steve finally pulled out, earning a whine from both of them. He collapsed onto the bed beside her, pulling her into his arms and kissing her forehead gently. 

Neither one of them said anything for a long while, both of them just relishing in the feel of the other beside them. “Eight years,” Steve whispered after a while. Natasha tilted her head up to look at him, her eyebrows knitted together in confusion as she waited for him to elaborate. “I’ve been imagining this for eight years.” 

“What?” Natasha asked with a laugh, “having sex with me?” 

“No,” he replied, giving her a genuine smile, “though that’s definitely a nice bonus. I meant _this_ , holding you in my arms, kissing you, showing you how much you mean to me, just this.” He kissed her forehead once more before continuing, “I want this, Nat. I want you. I have for eight years and now that we’re here-“ he stopped for a minute, bringing his gaze to hers again, “-I don’t want to lose it.” 

A grin spread across Natasha’s face as she pushed herself up to straddle him, the blankets he’d pulled over them bunching at her waist. “You can’t get rid of me that easily, Rogers,” she teased, leaning down to place a kiss to his lips, “and if you keep making me orgasm like that, you’re definitely never getting rid of me.” She raised an eyebrow challengingly at him, drawing a hearty laugh from his chest. 

“You’ve got yourself a deal,” he replied, brushing her hair back behind her ear before welcoming her lips for another kiss.


End file.
